I’m in a Polish Anthology

If you’ve been wanting to read my short story HOUSE OF CATS in Polish, you’re in luck. Apparently it translates into DOM (Z) KOTÓW. There’s lots of other great authors like Cameron Pierce, Carlton Mellick III, Bradley Sands, and Edward Lee.

Check out the awesome cover with art by Ed Mironiuk. Click on the cover to grab a copy but you better hurry up, the printing will be extremely limited.

Official H.P. Lovecraft Film Fest Pre-Party/Shatnerquest Book Release Party

This Thursday in Portland, Oregon!

Bizarro Central Presents an evening of Bizarro Fiction, Comedy, Music, and Circus Acts in Celebration of H.P. Lovecraft at Portland’s only H.P. Lovecraft themed bar!

This is a very special event celebrating the H.P. Lovecraft Film Festival – a Portland institution and horror tradition. Come get drunk beneath the elder sign with us!

AND THAT’S NOT ALL – this is also the book release party for SHATNERQUEST by Jeff Burk. The sequel to Eraserhead Press’ 2009 cult hit SHATNERQUAKE.

Featuring:

MISS SPOOKY
Sideshow performer extraordinaire performing death defying feats and nauseating stunts!

CAMERON PIERCE
The author of CTHULHU COMES TO THE VAMPIRE KINGDOM will summon the deep one himself.

EFFWORD
Dark noise and electronic music from one of Portland’s premiere nightmare sound designers.

ROSS E. LOCKHART
The author of CHICK BASSIST and editor of BOOK OF CTHULHU VOL 1 & 2 with some hard-knock punk rock life lessons.

HOSTED BY JEFF BURK
The author of SHATNERQUEST with a guide of what to do in case of a giant William Shatner Attack

You don’t want to miss this weirdo literary musical sideshow!

Thursday, May 2
8:00 pm to 10:00 pm
FREE
21 +
The Lovecraft Bar
321 SE Grand Ave
Portland, OR
Facebook Event Page

Bizarro Central Presents is a continuing series of Portland events curated by Jeff Burk featuring bizarro authors and friends of bizarro.

Some Updates

How is everyone doing out there in internet land? It’s sunny and warm here in Portland, Oregon after yet another miserable and grey winter.

In case you missed it, my fourth novel is out. SHATNERQUEST is the follow-up to my 2009 debut SHATNERQUAKE. Click here to check it out.

I have a new short story, THE MOST ACCOMPLISHED CRACK HEAD IN THE WORLD in THE MAGAZINE OF BIZARRO FICTION #8. You can grab a copy of that here.

I have two new short stories that will be coming out later this year. July will see the release of IN HEAVEN EVERYTHING IS FINE: STORIES INSPIRED BY DAVID LYNCH edited by Cameron Pierce. My piece is titled HIPSTER HUNTER.

My story I’VE SEEN ENOUGH HENTEI TO KNOW WHERE THIS IS GOING will appear in a future issue of IMPERIAL YOUTH REVIEW. It will feature a new illustration from Chrissy Horchheimer who worked on SUPER GIANT MONSTER TIME and CRIPPLE WOLF. Once I know more, so will you.

Of course there’s been regular new Deadite Press releases that have kept me busy. Head over to the official website to find out what I’ve up to.

We’re always throwing parties and events here in Portland, OR, so if you’re in the area you should keep your eyes open for some cool shit. I try to keep my event page updated with the info.

The next shindig is The Official H.P. Lovecraft Film Fest Pre-Party/Shatnerquest Book Release Party at the Lovecraft Bar on May 2nd. Check out the facebook event for more info and I’ll be updating this site and Bizarro Central once I get more finalized.

That’s all the important news I got for you right now. Stay tuned. In the mean time, check out this shit:

SHATNERQUEST is out now!

Fuck, it’s been a long time since I’ve updated this place. But that’s going to change. Part of the reason that I’ve been quiet over the past few months is the tons of projects I’ve been working on. The first of these to come out is the long awaited sequel to Shatnerquake. That’s right folks, Shatnerquest is out!

After the apocalypse, three Star Trek fans and their morbidly obese cat embark on a quest to save their beloved idol, the one and only William Shatner, from the hostile world America has become.

But their journey will not be easy, for the wasteland is filled with cannibal cults, Klingon biker gangs, Zombie Borg, and all manner of mutant creatures. And once they arrive at their destination, they discover that William Shatner has been transformed into Shatzilla – a giant 100-story radioactive monster hell-bent on destroying all of Los Angeles.

Now instead of saving Shatner from this new apocalyptic world, these three fans must save the world from this new apocalyptic Shatner. If only there was another giant monster who could take him down…

From the author who brought you the cult hit Shatnerquake, comes another Shat-tastic sci-fi comedy that proves once and for all that there actually is something even bigger than William Shatner’s ego. And it is… William Shatner!

Click here to buy from Amazon.com

This is just the first piece of news. There is lots more to come…

TOP TEN MOVIES OF 2012

Over at Bizarro Central I annual article on the top ten movies of the year. Check it out!

Bradley Sands Reviews the Sequel to CRIPPLE WOLF

I had been keeping it quiet but – it’s true – my novella CRIPPLE WOLF will be be getting a sequel in the form of a LAW & ORDER: SVU episode. Bradley Sands got his hands on an advance screener copy and reviewed the episode. Check it out.

My BizarroCon Schedule or When My Dreads Will Be Used As Paint Brushes

Holy-god-damn-shit! It’s the fifth year of BizarroCon. I’ve been attending and working behind the scenes from the first gathering of drunken bizarro writers. This year I don’t have any readings but I am doing workshops and am a part of many events. Here’s what I’m up to:

FRIDAY

8:00-11:00am: WRITER’S WORKSHOP: HIGH CONCEPT BIZARRO (Jeff Burk)— Pitch and critique bizarro book ideas with your bizarro peers and learn what it takes to write bizarro fiction novels that sell based on their ideas alone. PRE-REGISTRATION REQUIRED. WORKSHOP FULL (Location: The Mt Hood Room)

SATURDAY

11:30-12:15pm: VIRAL BOOK MARKETING (Jeff Burk, Rose O’Keefe, Cameron Pierce, Kevin Shamel) —Tips and tricks for marketing your book online, using blogs to your advantage, and the four emotions that make something go viral. (Location: The Barley Room)

12:30-1:15 pm: ALAN CLARK PAINTS WITH THE EXQUISITE BRUSH, JEFF BURK—Watch award-winning artist Alan M. Clark as he uses Jeff Burk’s dreadlocks in a live painting demonstration. (Location: The Ad House)

1:30-2:15pm: WHAT TO DO WITH A POO-FLAVORED DICK (John Skipp, Brian Keene, Shane McKenzie, Robert Devereaux, Jeff Burk) — Shock in bizarro and horror fiction—what has been done, what not to do, and what the hell is even shocking anymore anyway? (Location: The Barley Room)

SUNDAY

2:30-3:30pm: HOW TO CREATE A KICKASS LITERARY EVENT (Rose O’Keefe, Mykle Hansen, Jeff Burk) —Want to throw an awesome reading, book release party, or other writerly shindig? Learn the ins and outs of event coordination with bizarrocon staff members. (Location: The Barley Room)

You can find the full schedule of events here.

You’ll also be able to find be around Edgefield the whole weekend attending workshops and readings, and, of course, drinking and smoking. I look forward to seeing all you weirdos there!